My guest for Episode #37 of “My Favorite Mistake” is Monica M. Bijoux, the founder and CEO of DECIDE TO MOVE. She has been coaching business owners, entrepreneurs, and individuals for almost 20 years.
As a veteran herself, she has been working with veterans as they transition from active duty life to business owners and entrepreneurs for over 10 years. Monica has a Masters of Science Administration with a concentration in Human Resources and a Masters of Social Work.
Monica is host of a podcast, also called “Decide to Move”, and she has co-authored three books: Fiercely Speaking; Teach Your Expertise; and Propel.
In this episode, Monica talks about learning to follow her intuition and learning to value herself. What are some of the challenges that veterans face when transitioning to civilian life? And, we also talk about her coaching work and how not to be victim.
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Automated Transcript (May Contain Mistakes)
Mark Graban (1s):
Episode 37 Monica M. Bijoux, CEO of Decide to Move.
Monica Bijoux (7s):
So my favorite mistake is because I'm a very spiritual person. It's really not listening to that voice, that my intuition…
Mark Graban (20s):
I'm Mark Graban. This is My Favorite Mistake. In this podcast, you'll hear business leaders and other really interesting people talking about their favorite mistakes, because we all make mistakes, but what matters is learning from our mistakes instead of repeating them over and over again. So this is the place for honest reflection and conversation, personal growth and professional success. Visit our website at myfavoritemistakepodcast.com and now on with the show. Well, hi, welcome to my favorite mistake. I'm Mark Graban. We're joined today by Monica M. Bijoux. She is the founder and CEO of her company Decide to Move.
Mark Graban (1m 1s):
She's been coaching business owners, entrepreneurs and individuals for almost 20 years. She's a veteran of the US military and she has been working with other veterans as they transition from active duty life to being business owners and entrepreneurs. She's been doing that for more than a decade. So it's very, very important work. She has a master's of science administration with a concentration in human resources and a master's of social work degree. Monica is a host of a podcast herself called decide to move like her company. And she's co-authored three books. And you can learn about all of that at her website, decide to move.com. So Monica, first off, thank you for joining us today.
Mark Graban (1m 42s):
How are you?
Monica Bijoux (1m 43s):
Great. Thank you, Mark. For even having me, this is exciting.
Mark Graban (1m 47s):
Well, I think while I have a lot of things to talk about, thank you for your service and for the important work that you do, helping people transition into their post-military lives.
Monica Bijoux (1m 57s):
Most definitely. Yeah, not only do I do that for people in the military, but also those that are out that are never been in the military, but they go from corporate to now wanting to be that have their own coaching or whatever. And I'm finding so many people struggle and they get, when you're feeling uncertain about, Oh my gosh, I'm successful over here. Why can't I seem to do it over here? So then you search for all these different quick schemes or tactics to do, and I want to help them by taking away all the fluff, no trial and error. Let's get you to where you know, that you deserve to be. So that's what I enjoy doing.
Mark Graban (2m 31s):
Yeah. Well, that's great. And, and that shows, I can tell you enjoy that. So that's great. So I have a lot to talk about today, but as we normally do here, I'll ask you Monica to jump right in. Do you have a story about what you consider to be your favorite mistake?
Monica Bijoux (2m 47s):
Yes. ause I'm a very spiritual person. It's really not listening to that voice, that my intuition and coming from a life of, you know, abuse and things like that. And you learn how to not listen to yourself because people often tell you, you know, Oh, like I have a strong intuition of like picking up on people's personality. And I remember saying all the time, I don't like that person. Something's not right. I don't know what's going on with the situation. And often told you don't like anybody, or you're always being judgy. You know, even though it really was me picking up truly what was going on. So as I got older and even in a business situation, when I got was transitioning and really starting my own business, I was at a workshop and conference and I had this strong intuition not to follow, you know, to sign up for this program.
Monica Bijoux (3m 39s):
It was a mastermind, but I had a roommate that was there with me and they're like, Oh, you should do it on my gosh. It's great. And we're going to learn so much. And $23,000 later, I like learned nothing like literally, well actually what I did learn is what not to do and what I want to make sure it doesn't happen with my clients. And so it was a very expensive mistake, but one of the things I'm going to say is listen to that instinct, listen to that, that small voice, that higher power, whatever you call it to really ensure that you are true to yourself, or if you're not even sure, take a moment and step back and don't do fast action. For me, I wished that I would have listened to that.
Monica Bijoux (4m 21s):
Cause I would have saved myself quite a bit of money. I can actually say going forward. Now I am surrounded with some really great coaches where I'm growing. It was a pretty expensive lesson learned and mistake to have.
Mark Graban (4m 38s):
Wow. I was wondering if you could elaborate a little bit around learning, why you, you kind of made reference to learning inadvertently, I guess, to not trust your intuition, how much more would you be willing to share about what, what led to doubting that intuition?
Monica Bijoux (5m 3s):
Yeah, most definitely. I mean, cause you know, people who've heard me on my own podcast as well as on other people's podcasts for me, I have even in the books that I've written, I use my, the things that I've been through to talk about my relationship with my daughter, you know, how to be a better leader, different things like that. And so I will, I was raised where I went through physical sexual and emotional abuse and was put down, told you're stupid. You're dumb, you're ugly. You'll never amount to anything. Whenever I would feel like I have this intuition, this instinct that something was not right. I was told that what I'm thinking and what I'm feeling is not accurate. And I've went into multiple people where they go into that.
Monica Bijoux (5m 44s):
Like you raised in a home where you have you say something and it's like, Oh, you don't feel like that. And especially men, men are raised in that situation where if they're crying or they're hurt, Oh, suck it up. You're just, you know, that didn't hurt. And so after a while you stopped listening to that piece and start judging yourself and doubting your own viewpoints in your own values because you hear that little voice once again that, Oh, this you're just being a baby or that's not important, what you're thinking and what you're feeling is not actually accurate. So you stop listening to that. And it, and even though I am a therapist and I've done a lot of work and overcame that it still has those moments that surfaces up where I won't listen to that piece, I'll listen to someone else and they'll say like the mastermind, Oh, you should join.
Monica Bijoux (6m 32s):
And, and actually that was the last time that I ever happened. Now when I get that part and I think it was because I was in a vulnerable place, right. You're hyped up, you're at a conference, you know, you're, you're going into the business world and you're like, Oh my gosh, I'm gonna have my own mastermind. That I'm a part of, it was the first one ever. And so that little voice inside came in like stop being so judgmental. This is going to be a great opportunity. You don't, you know, you're always like taking things and not, you know, like being dismissive, you know, that kind of stuff. And so that's kind of where that stem from is like those old beliefs surfacing up that I wasn't what I thought and what I felt was not accurate.
Monica Bijoux (7m 15s):
Even though I was told I was stupid and dumb. I'm like I got straight A's and had a 4.0, graduated, Magna cum laude. But it took still not until I became an, a captain in the military. When I actually finally said to myself, man, I'm proud of me. Like, and that's sad. That's like, you know, cause I joined later in life. So for me to finally say, I'm proud of myself, it took a long time to even get that. And I know a lot of listeners are probably feeling the exact same thing where they doubt who they are and what they actually believe in.
Mark Graban (7m 46s):
Oh gosh. That is unfortunate to be. Have that reinforced or conditioned to doubt your own worth or doubt your gut feel about certain situations. That's, that's probably sort of connected if, if you feel better, is this a generalization, if you feel better about yourself, you're going to tend to feel better about what you think you're feeling.
Monica Bijoux (8m 13s):
Yes. You know, and one of the biggest things that I do is I'll have, I think what helps my client to say everything I do is based on their personality. And so sometimes they'll come to me, they're all over the place. They're like, Oh my gosh, I don't even know what direction I'm like, just talk to me, just tell me what you're thinking that, just get it out. And then we'll process it from there. And I think that's super huge and important where I will do that. Now I journal, like I've done that with like in that particular moment, that conference that I was in, I did not do the things that I normally do the strategy of taking a step back and not allowing a person to pressure me and writing out my feelings, you know, writing it out, getting it all out, come to going away, coming and then saying, okay, yep.
Monica Bijoux (8m 56s):
I feel comfortable. And I didn't do that. And for me, that was a good mistake to make because it now is a place where even in my own business, I make sure that I have my clients go think about it and then come back. I know some people, you know, when someone is wanting to sign a car, okay, go ahead and get your credit card, get your contract out, you know? And then we'll send you the contract later. I often tell my clients, I will send you like my private clients. I will send you the contract. Look it over, think about it. And then when you're ready, you know, to make that investment, then we'll have another conversation because I never want someone to feel icky uncomfortable. It's not going to be calm. They're not going to be able to really be, really show up and be able to really perform and do the best that they can.
Monica Bijoux (9m 42s):
If they're not feeling comfortable with the decision they made. So I don't want them to have that, that FOMO, the fear of missing out. I want them to make a good sound decision. So when we start working together, they are ready.
Mark Graban (9m 53s):
Yeah. I think it's interesting. You know, there, there's a couple of different ways your story could be framed. They, I mean, and without being too flippant, the one way might be don't sign up for something where there's not a refund policy.
Monica Bijoux (10m 9s):
Mark Graban (10m 11s):
Be pressured into something in a, you know, in a high pressure time sensitive, do it now sort of way. And, and, and some of those reactions could be maybe not incorrectly pointing the finger at others. Like they did me wrong and in some way, but, but I think it's interesting. So what it was getting to is that, that you framed it, you reflected and looked a little bit more inward about not listening to my intuition. So I'm, I'm, I'm curious if you could kind of talk through the thought process of finding the balance of looking at so well, here's something somebody else has done versus here's what I have control over as an individual or what you could do differently in the future.
Mark Graban (10m 59s):
What was, what was some of your thought process on that?
Monica Bijoux (11m 1s):
Most definitely. I never look at what someone else, cause no one can make you do anything. I mean, even if a person has a gun to your head and they're like, say something funny, like you cannot make me say something funny. If I'm not feeling it, I probably will laugh because I think it's so stupid. But even no matter what they do, you still have a choice. And so what I have always learned to do is when I'm re I always reflect on everything, anything that I do, I come back and I reflect on it and say, how could I have done differently? Okay. I signed up for this mastermind. There is no refund policy. I'm feeling a certain kind of way about it, but what can I do to make the best of this situation? So I'm, I'm constantly come from that place.
Monica Bijoux (11m 44s):
And I think, and as a world in society, we would do so much better instead of always coming from a place of victimization. Like I could have been a victim in that situation said they got me and she did this and they promised me this and they didn't. And instead of me coming from that place, it's like, did I listen to my own instincts of saying, no, not right now. Like, this is not the program for you because of the fact of whatever the reason is instead, I was just like, wow. I looked at the bells and what's not even the bells and whistles. It was more like listening to someone else saying, you should go for it. I'm doing it. You should do it. I think that you would do really good here. And instead of my instinct was like, yeah, but this is not the person for you.
Monica Bijoux (12m 26s):
I went against that. And so I have to always take ownership of my behavior and my actions, because at the end of the day, no one has control of me. And that's one of the things that I teach other people is no matter what happens, what do you like the pandemic? We didn't have control of it. But what do you have control of in that situation? You have control of your attitude. You have control of how you show up. You have control of how you refocus and reframe your day. Or like if you had these goals, how do you make them where you do that pivotal shift. And that's, my business is about making pivotal shifts. So it's constantly from that frame of, I can't do it, make a pivot. If I'm too busy, looking behind me or focusing on what happened.
Monica Bijoux (13m 7s):
I mean, I love sports. So think about a basketball player where when they're pivoting, they have one foot planet and the other one is looking for a right place to go either. I'm, they're going to dribble or they're going to pass it where you can't do that. If you're sitting there looking down and focusing on the fact that, Oh my gosh, these people are surrounding me. And they did this to me and he's pulling my jersey. They're focused on what their next step in their direction is. And so that's how I often live my life from that standpoint.
Mark Graban (13m 36s):
I, I don't know if this works at the analogy, but if you're saying, if you, if you're looking down and you're thinking that someone's going to steal the ball for a man, yes. I don't know what that translates to exactly. But I don't know if there's,
Monica Bijoux (13m 51s):
We're always going to try to steal the ball from you. But if you're focusing on the last play, that person, cause you know, they're all in, you're pulling your jersey and grabbing you. And if you're busy focusing on that, instead of focusing on what your next direction and move is going to be, you end up getting tripped up. It's kind of taken that big. Did you see what he did to me? No coach. He was pulling my shirt. So I couldn't make a play like, and you will see people who do that. And there, most times it don't bode very well for them. And they don't usually are not a good team player. It's the one who's able to make a quick decision really quickly are the ones that we learn to love, you know, Jordan, Kobe, like there's just so many, you know, bird. They were able to always take a situation and make the best out of it.
Monica Bijoux (14m 34s):
I told you I love sports. I can't help it
Mark Graban (14m 38s):
Think about, you know, if you watch, you know, a football game and this happens in basketball or hockey, it's the person who retaliates, who gets penalized more often than not. And maybe this comes back to what you were talking about. You have control over your own reactions that yeah, somebody punched you in the back of the head. When the ref wasn't looking, you can choose to react or you can stop and think and keep control. Maybe easier said than done. But have you try to coach people through situations like that? I think back to like some of the Stephen Covey teachings, I saw him talk once. And one thing that really stuck with me was I try, you know, it's a separate stimulus and response that as people, we sometimes more than others do have, you know, control and, and not just being completely reactive.
Mark Graban (15m 30s):
What, what, what are some of your thoughts about getting better at that or coaching others to be better at that?
Monica Bijoux (15m 36s):
Just like anything that takes practice. But one of the things like, like I said, I let people just, you know, flood me with their information, whether it's my coaching clients or my therapy clients, and just flooded me with whatever's on their mind and just freely talk and coat space for them. You know, I don't shut them off when they're like, why did you think that? Or that was dumb. I just let them give it to me. And then when we're done after they processed it, cause a lot of times you just have to get it out of you once there, because especially when you're growing up, you're not validated. You're told to, you know, automatically stop before you even finish your, your feelings or your thought. So I let them just be able to say it all out and just hold space and validate them. I can understand why you were frustrated in that particular situation.
Monica Bijoux (16m 21s):
Now looking at the whole picture based on, and I'll repeat what they said to me. What things do you feel like you actually had control of in there? What things could you have done? And so they're coming from a free flowing place where it's not filled with judgment. It's not filled with not feeling, feeling validated. It's coming from a place of thinking where they're actually now able to look at the whole picture and be able to think and think through it. And they ended up coming up with their own like, Oh, I could've done this. I could've, you know, did this, or, and next time I would have done this. And I validate it's like, usually when we're in our fight flight or freeze or in that moment of reaction, your brain does not give you the ability to think in that moment.
Monica Bijoux (17m 1s):
So let's come up with avenues where it becomes a habit to do that when it's a habit, it's a lot easier than being reactive because when you're in your emotions, it's very hard to think and focus and come up with a good solution. So it's always like one holding space for someone and just allowing them to feel and have emotions.
Mark Graban (17m 23s):
Yeah. And to respect that and
Monica Bijoux (17m 26s):
Yes, validating, it's huge. And we miss that big part of our lives as people validating us. You know? So,
Mark Graban (17m 36s):
And have you watched the, this is it's sports related, but it's been a popular show this past year, Ted Lasso, have you watched that?
Monica Bijoux (17m 44s):
I haven't this year has been a really trying year. So I haven't been watching very much TV because between my business and then dealing with medical stuff and then working like TV, I had to be very intentional. So when I get off from watching therapy, you know, doing therapy and then going into coaching and just variations, cause they both require different sets of skillsets. I usually will watch something that doesn't require me to think at all. So like the Masked Singer or, you know, something that has thinking, and I don't have to think about anything that they're saying or doing.
Mark Graban (18m 17s):
Well and, and, and part of why I brought it up. I mean, it, it, you know, in difficult times, I mean, I think Ted Lasso is a very, it's a very unique show. It a lot of ways. It's a very positive show. And you know, in the, in the 10 episodes of it, he gets about episode eight. And there's a scene about trying to give away the whole thing, or I'm certainly not going to try to recreate it, but there there's a scene where Ted Lasso who's as American, who is a fish out of water in England coaching, what we would call soccer, not American football, which is his background. But you know, it gives us a little speech about always being underestimated.
Mark Graban (18m 59s):
And he's basically in the process of hustling the former owner of the soccer team and a game of darts in a pub. And like, if I win the game, you have to stay away from the team and your ex-wife who now owns it. But, you know, he gives us a little speech and a basically he gives us lesson of, you know, people, people like, you know, people think they have it all figured out, judge everybody else. And instead of judging, ask more questions, be curious, not judgmental. And you know, that, that, that scene hit me in a lot of ways because that's something I've, I'm not trying to turn this into a counseling session. I find myself being judgmental. And I think there's a good reminder there of, of asking questions kind of remind, you know, so you're, you're talking about respecting how someone is feeling or reacting anyway.
Mark Graban (19m 52s):
Monica Bijoux (19m 52s):
No, you're fine. No, this is perfectly trying and no, it's not. And I'll ask you that you explained what it is. I'll probably go look at it and, and put added in my schedule somewhere. But no, I think that's a super huge part is, and I like that about asking more questions and one of the things that I have taught people, it's a communication tactic. It's an assertive communication. It keeps it out of that feelings of, Oh, you did this to me or anything else like that. And it's called FITS: Fact Impact and Solution. And focusing on those three things allows you to really focus on the fact that the action of hap would happen, the act, the impact of that act, and then a solution of how you prefer to see things happen later.
Monica Bijoux (20m 36s):
And having those three little components, those three littles assertive steps keeps you into from going into the, you zone, the blaming, the shaming it's fact, this what happened, this is the impact it had on me or this, you know, or whatever situation we're in. And then here's a solution or, or what do you recommend we do so that it won't happen again. But when a person is able to focus on a solution, instead of feeling a certain kind of way, insecure or inadequate, it actually breeds for a better relationship. And you know, whether it's business, your clients, your family, your children, it works in everything. And the people that I've taught it to. It's funny because they'll come back and they'd be like, Oh my gosh, I fixed them today.
Monica Bijoux (21m 19s):
And I was just, I just start laughing. Then it's like, they turned it into an action word. And I was like, okay. So tell me about it. And especially for when I'm working with couples, I'll say, how did it feel for you on the other end? It was like, it was so much better because it opened up conversation. It allowed us to have a conversation of, you know, I can go into that was not my intent to, you know, cause you pain or have you feel a certain kind of way, you know, and let's, you know, let's look at this or here's my suggestion or solution of how we can change it or do something different. So it just totally changes the conversation piece. And so I find myself doing, that's the way I communicate with people, especially when I'm feeling frustrated or upset.
Monica Bijoux (22m 3s):
I ha I take a step back and then I come back from a fact place. So this is what happened. This is the impact that it had on me. And this is what I would like to see different. And it just totally changes the way that I have conversation or communication with people.
Mark Graban (22m 18s):
Hmm. So yeah, I think that's important to recap. So what what's, what's the fact, what was the impact? What would you like to see?
Monica Bijoux (22m 25s):
Yep, exactly. Yeah.
Mark Graban (22m 27s):
And, and that sounds like a way I was going to ask earlier, you talked about reflecting this model in a way, seems like a way of helping coaching someone else through a cycle of reflection, instead of just saying go reflect. Sometimes people need something a little more prescriptive.
Monica Bijoux (22m 46s):
Yeah. Cause we do that, you know, I like I was, did a training on offer, like making an irresistible offer. And I started thinking about, you know, like the details that go in it where so many people go, go make a, create an irresistible offer. And, and then that way you set yourself up for success and I'm like, well, what exactly is the irresistible offer? It sounds beautiful. And I hear you saying it, but can you break it down a little further? And I think that's different, unique about my style is that I am a person that liked to break things down where it's easy to digest and then it's easier to execute because if I can digest it, then I can execute. Instead of me sitting there like, well, I don't know where the irresistible offer is, so I'm just going to make up something.
Monica Bijoux (23m 27s):
And then when I get upset that it didn't work and then they were like, well, maybe you didn't do it right. Or maybe we didn't explain it where I didn't understand it. I'm gonna take responsibility and understand it. So can we look at another way of teaching me? So I like to teach by seeing hearing and doing, you know, all of our senses and different people learn in different ways. So I guess exactly. So I do a little bit of all of that on my whiteboard, you know, like it's a mixture, have them do the work. So that's how I've seen my clients actually become successful for my coaching clients and my therapy clients actually get better because of that. Yeah.
Mark Graban (24m 4s):
So before we wrap up and again, our guest is Monica M Bijoux. I want to talk a little bit more, let you talk more about some of that coaching that you do. And, and like we established earlier, part of what you do is coaching veterans, as they transition into the civilian sector, are there, are there, so what are the most common challenges? I don't know if mistakes is a inappropriate way of framing any of that, but what are some of the challenges of coming from that environment back into the civilian world and in the business world?
Monica Bijoux (24m 38s):
I think the most challenging thing is that you have veterans who went in at a very young age, 18 years old. And they usually, when people going into the military, not everyone, but there's a big chunk that go in because they're getting escaping home, escaping the environment that they have. And the military does not raise you to be, you know, like they don't, like they say, they want to become your family, but it doesn't always breed that way. They expect certain things from you. So when a person is, a lot of times, they don't understand that, know their worth because they end up becoming doers. Right. I, I moved from place to place multiple times. If you're enlisted, it's like, you can be at one place for seven, eight years.
Monica Bijoux (25m 21s):
Sometimes you can be there as three or four. If you're an officer two years, no more than four. So you're, you're have that constantly moving transition. And you are, as rank happens, you're put in a leadership position, however, you're still required to do your job. So a lot of times when they get out, they're looking from a technical standpoint, technically this is what I'm able to do. And they forget the fact of all the leadership skills and the training that they received from that standpoint. So when they, after spending 20 something years in service, you can walk into a managerial position and do very well because you've been doing it for the last 12 years. And that's one of the biggest things that I see that a lot of them don't have.
Monica Bijoux (26m 2s):
Like I had a client recently and he was getting ready, he's getting ready to retire. And he was like, you know, so we were talking about, okay, what's your transition? What is your, what does it look like? What does your next phase look like? And they said, well, I'm going to get out and I'm going to go for six figures. And you know, people often say, I give people, looks, I don't know what those looks are, but I think I gave him a look. I'm like, really? That's what you're doing. Six figures. And he, or no, it was five figures. Yeah. He wasn't like $60,000 or 70 or something like that. It was like a bold number. Yeah. It wasn't six figure. It was like, yeah, like 50, 60,000. And I'm like, and I was like, seriously, so let's talk about it.
Monica Bijoux (26m 43s):
Let me, you, you know, so I use my whiteboard and I wrote down a list of all the, I just had them start listing all their skillsets and the things that they do. And then I, you know, sat back and I said, just look at that, just look at that list right now and just look at it and tell me what you tell me, what you see. And I said, what would you say if you had a, you were a boss, a CEO of a big company, and you had to hire somebody that came with all those, not only the technical skills, but those soft skills, what would you be? Think, think that they were worth. And they was like, man, what, all that I think about six figures, like, you know, 150 a minimum. And I was like, really? Cause that person is you, you know? And it's like, it's as simple a reflecting because we often think lower of ourselves than what we're worth.
Monica Bijoux (27m 25s):
So that's, you know, not say the big mistake, but the biggest thing that I see has been the hangup of really understanding their work, that they're coming from a skillset that a lot of people don't actually have when they come out. So that's and being able to work under hard situations, being very disciplined, just a whole bunch of stuff. So that's one of the things that I've seen.
Mark Graban (27m 49s):
Yeah. Well, and it's good that you're able to help people from all walks of life deal with their professional challenges or career transition challenges or personal personal challenges. Yeah.
Monica Bijoux (28m 1s):
Most definitely. Most definitely.
Mark Graban (28m 4s):
So Monica, the website is wwwdecidetomove.com. So it's just spelled out T O move.com. Maybe one last question. What, what's the origin of the name Decide to Move?
Monica Bijoux (28m 17s):
Yes. So I'm Oh, for, so decide to move, but thought he was gonna ask me about my name itself. So decide to move really came about each letter is an acronym. That's why it's in capital letters. I ended up helping this accompany one time without me even understanding what I was doing. I like not saying, understanding what I was doing. I didn't have the name in place, but I was volunteering, helping this computer guy. And it was coming from a very natural instinct of organization, helping him with his time management, helping him with, you know, just showing up, making good decisions, just the commitment, how he dressed the whole bit. And I was just, you know, went into his shop and I was volunteering. I was just like, dude, you're making like two, three hundred a week and you could be making so much more look at how your shop look, look how you're showing up.
Monica Bijoux (29m 7s):
Like I just started doing what came naturally to me. And so I started helping him with all these little tweaks and turns. He went from making like hundreds of dollars a week to six figures in six months. And so then I was, I was actually in school doing my human resource degree and we ended up having to write a paper where they're like, you're a change agent. And you go into this business, you, you know, help them make some adjustments. What do you do? You know, do a presentation on it. And like I said, I'm helping this guy from and doing things that came very naturally to me. And I was like, I don't know what I did. Did I do anything? I mean, I know he's making money. What are those things? And so I do what I do all the time and I prayed. I was like, Lord, my presentation is tomorrow.
Monica Bijoux (29m 50s):
And I have absolutely nothing right now because it's fairly, I'm a last minute girl when it comes to papers. Cause I get an a on them. That's when they from school, they see how they can mess you up. I get an A because I'll do it the day before it's due. And so I'm focused on the real meat and not the fluff when I wait till the last minute writing papers only, not other stuff. And so I just prayed about it. It was like, okay, it's two o'clock in the morning and have nothing there have my little notebook on my bed. And all of a sudden these words started popping in my head and I just took my notebook and started writing them down and then went to sleep, woke up the next morning. It's like, okay, let me take this. I don't even remember what I wrote, take my notebook, my laptop, and just write this stuff out and create this presentation.
Monica Bijoux (30m 35s):
And when I finished it spelled decide to move. Each letter is an acronym that deals with transition transformation, growth development. And so that's when decided to move came about. So yeah, it's really taking people through this journey.
Mark Graban (30m 52s):
Yeah. Well, it's great that you get to do that Monica and, and, and you're, you're part of a, a subset of my guests who have a knack or you, you stumbled into it or, you know, for coming up with an acronym or something for a framework, I, I should spend some time that that's a helpful way of describing what it is that you offer and what you do. So, and that is spelled out on the website again, that's decidetomove.com. So again, we've been joined today by Monica M. Bijoux. Monica, it was a pleasure to get to meet you here. And thank you so much for being a guest and sharing your story and some of your insights with us.
Monica Bijoux (31m 32s):
Thank you so much, Mark. And I look forward to you being on mine. We'll talk about that. Another time
Mark Graban (31m 38s):
Decide to be on. Yes. Yes.
Monica Bijoux (31m 41s):
Sounds good. Thank you so much.
Mark Graban (31m 44s):
Thanks for listening. I hope this podcast inspires you to pause and think about your own favorite mistake and how learning from mistakes shapes you personally and professionally. If you're a leader, what can you do to create a culture where it's safe for colleagues to talk openly about mistakes in the spirit of learning, please subscribe, rate, and review the podcast. Our website is myfavoritemistakepodcast.com. See you next time.