Being Surprised by Losing Her Consulting Role: Kristie Tobias

Being Surprised by Losing Her Consulting Role: Kristie Tobias

My guest for Episode #42 of “the My Favorite Mistake” podcast is Kristie Tobias, author of the new book Fearlessly Made You: Surviving and Thriving in a Perfectly Imperfect Life. You can learn more about Kristie and the book via the book's website.

Kristie Tobias is a Consultant with Huron Consulting Group, Coach, National Speaker and she is now, as of this week, a published author with over 15 years of consulting and leadership experience. She has consulted over 30 organizations on topics focused on change management and leadership, employee engagement, leadership development, business optimization, and financial improvement.

Content warning: Kristie does briefly mention instances of being abused in her past. We do not discuss this in detail, but the subject matter might be alarming to some listeners.

In the episode, Kristie shares a story about her favorite mistake, earlier in her consulting career, when she was removed from her role working with healthcare C-suite executives. Kristie reflects and shares that she “wasn't honest with herself about the internal work that needed to be done to improve the client” and she “took for granted” that she needed to grow, learn, and move relationships deeper than the surface.

She says she can “now look back and laugh” because she has come a long way. We also talk about her book, what a “perfectly imperfect life” means (from the subtitle of her book) and what it means to be a better version of oneself.

Here is an article about Kristie using exercise as a way to overcome PTSD.

Scroll down to find:

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  • Quotes
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  • Full transcript

You can listen to or watch the episode below. A transcript also follows lower on this page. Please subscribe, rate, and review via Apple Podcasts or Podchaser! You can now sign up to get new episodes via email, to make sure you don't miss an episode. This podcast is part of the Lean Communicators network.

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Kristie now has a podcast, “Fearlessly Made You”:


Quotes:

"I took for granted the fact that I needed to internally grow and put in the work to understand the hard work that those [client executives] go through every single day."

"I laugh because I can now look back and laugh at [my favorite mistake]."

"I use the phrase fearless, not because I am not afraid, but because I don't allow the fear to define me."

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Automated Transcript (May Contain Mistakes)

Mark Graban (1s):
Episode 42, Kristie Tobias, author of “Fearlessly Made You.”

Kristie Tobias (8s):
We all have so many mistakes that we make, especially on our journeys in our career. And especially if you've ever made a transition in your career,

Mark Graban (20s):
Mark Graban. This is My Favorite Mistake. In this podcast. You'll hear business leaders and other really interesting people talking about their favorite mistakes, because we all make mistakes, but what matters is learning from our mistakes instead of repeating them over and over again. So this is the place for honest reflection and conversation, personal growth and professional success. Visit our website at myfavoritemistakepodcast.com. Enter to win a signed copy of Kristie's book Fearlessly Made You go to MarkGraban.com/mistake42. And now on with the show today, I'm really happy that we're joined by Kristie Tobias.

Mark Graban (1m 2s):
She is the author of the new book titled “Fearlessly Made You: Surviving and Thriving in a Perfectly Imperfect Life. So we'll, we'll talk about the book and before I introduce Kristie a little bit more, let me welcome you. Thanks for joining us.

Kristie Tobias (1m 18s):
Thank you so much, Mark. Very excited to be here and grateful to spend some time with you.

Mark Graban (1m 23s):
Yeah, it'd be nice. And it can, again, congratulations on the book.

Kristie Tobias (1m 27s):
Thank you so much.

Mark Graban (1m 29s):
So a little bit more about Kristie. She is a consultant with Huron Consulting Group. She's a coach and national speaker and now author with over 15 years of consulting and leadership experience, she's consulted with over 30 organizations on topics focused on change management and leadership, employee engagement, leadership development, business optimization, and financial improvement. And I met Kristie, was, it was almost a year ago. It was like the last public thing I'm sure either of us did before the pandemic. Right?

Kristie Tobias (2m 1s):
Absolutely. Literally right before .

Mark Graban (2m 5s):
People were already starting to be aware of handshakes and hand sanitizer. I, you know, or if not shaking hands that, that was the last handshake with somebody.

Kristie Tobias (2m 17s):
Yeah, absolutely. And it's interesting thinking about that because it, not that we were all overly affectionate by any means, but it was, the things are happening very quickly. And in the matter of like 24 hours, I think we all just started distancing ourselves. Yeah.

Mark Graban (2m 31s):
Yeah. Cause somebody at my table, we have the habits, he reached across, shook my head and then he said, and he's a doctor. And he's like, “Oh yeah, we're not supposed to do that now.”

Kristie Tobias (2m 41s):
Yeah. Right.

Mark Graban (2m 43s):
We were okay. But I was also going to say, you know, I had the pleasure of being introduced by Kristie before my talk and sharing the stage and then, and then seeing Kristie speak. So I'm glad we can reconnect and do the podcast too.

Kristie Tobias (2m 57s):
Absolutely. It was a pleasure and was such a joy getting to be part of your own presentation, you know, Mark, I, I admire and appreciate everything that you've done and, and getting to share the stage briefly with you, but then also experiencing your work. It was wonderful for me.

Mark Graban (3m 14s):
Well, thank you. And here we are, I'm thrilled to be sharing this podcast stage with you. So let me turn over. We'll put the spotlight on you here at Kristie. As we ask all of our guests here, what would you say is your favorite mistake?

Kristie Tobias (3m 27s):
Oh, you know, Mark, it's interesting because since we've met and since we've had this conversation about having the chance to be on this podcast, I've really thought very deeply about this question because I'm sure like many of us, and I've had a chance to listen to your podcasts. We all have so many mistakes that we make, especially on our journeys in our career. And especially if you've ever made a transition in your career. And so I would say, I almost have to give a little context and background behind said mistake and what had happened. So I've spent over I'm as I'm getting older, a closer now to 20 years in the healthcare industry. So both administratively clinically, and I've literally probably worked in every single avenue of health care.

Kristie Tobias (4m 8s):
And with that work, one of the things that I always loved was the opportunity to help organizations be better versions of themselves. And I know that sounds cliche, but it's just one of my passions. If you ask my parents, it's kind of what I grew up doing as a kid is always trying to find a better way to do something or help others just improve. And so with that, the organization that I was working with probably about now eight to nine years ago was a hospital. I was working there and I was introduced to what was then Studer Group, but is now under Huron Consulting Group. The coaching team there. And my coach at the time was they had just started on their journey. So for those of you that don't know, it's, it's a contracting journey where basically the goal is how do we improve the way that we objective.

Kristie Tobias (4m 54s):
We set goals in the organization, how do we improve the way we deliver care? The engagement that we have with our employees and the way we allow physicians to practice in a better space, in a better environment, all of that, you know, small things, some really great things that make you organization tick. And so, and seeing the work of the coach and every organization has a coach. That's assigned to them who works hand in hand with the executive team, building out just a strategic plan for what that looks like. And then coaches from executives all the way down to frontline employees and helps improve and help other people do better versions to be better, better versions of themselves and do their work better. As you can imagine for me, I was just in awe. You know, there are people that like worship celebrities or love athletes.

Kristie Tobias (5m 36s):
I'm like the nerd that loves like professionals. I had followed the Studer Group. I did my master's thesis on Quint Studer before I even knew about Studer Group. And so getting the chance to like be in this, this, the same venue as a Studer Group coach I realized was like, this is where I want to go. This is the career direction. I finally have seen the direction I want to go. And so after that meeting, I actually had the chances probably two years to the day of meeting my coach. I was asked to be part of Studer Group at that time. And I became a coach within six months of my gtransition to Studer Group. So within that time I spent about two and a half, three years coaching on site with organizations.

Kristie Tobias (6m 17s):
And what that means is, you know, pre COVID, we traveled all the time. So I'm talking, you know, most consultants you think travel Monday through Thursday as a Studer Group coach, you traveled Sunday through Saturday, basically because you were at a different organization across the world. And I was a national coach. So I went across the state every day. So a different organization. And as you can imagine, after two and a half and three, two, and after three years of doing that, you get exhausted. And my favorite mistake, so leading into it, I know nice buildup. My favorite mistake that I made was I wasn't honest with myself about the internal work that needed to be done to help improve the work I was doing for the people around me, even though I knew that within my heart, I always wanted to help people be better versions of themselves that doesn't come with just I'm good at this.

Kristie Tobias (7m 11s):
So what may do that? It comes with taking the time to also internalize where are the opportunities and areas within my own improvement, that I'm not being honest with myself about. And that hit me in the face very quickly. I was promoted very quickly within Studer Group, which is now Huron Consulting Group because I have a great client facing relationship. I have, you know, natural skills and talents already that I was a communication major. So can speak to just about anything, anyone at any point in time. And I also love having those dialogues and conversations where the opportunity came in though, was I was in my late twenties.

Kristie Tobias (7m 54s):
I knew very little when it came down to it about what it meant to be a CEO of an organization or what it meant to be a CNO of an organization. And I took for granted the fact that I needed to internally grow and put in the work to understand the hard work that those individuals go through every single day. And so I allowed, and I, I took for granted the fact that I was already so naturally good at building those relationships, that I didn't understand those relationships and it, as it transpired throughout what I identified was the relationships that I started building were very surfaced. And so the deep work that needs to go into helping organizations be better versions of themselves takes a lot of uncomfortable moments.

Kristie Tobias (8m 43s):
It takes a lot of actually peeling back the layers of the onion and having difficult conversations with leaders, but building deep trust with them, by being able to say, you know what? I don't know your work. I don't know. You help me understand what work you've gone through, help me understand how your organization has succeeded, but where you feel like there have been failures. And it's not that I didn't ask those questions, but I didn't dive into those questions. I used the surface conversation to help drive my work. I used my busy-ness of being on a different facility every day to drive my work that I didn't step back and put in the real effort to say, what am I missing?

Kristie Tobias (9m 28s):
Because I don't have those experiences yet. And how can I humble myself to understand what those experiences mean to the people around me?

Mark Graban (9m 38s):
So I guess two questions. No, it's good. Two questions come to mind, Kristie. It's up to you. I'm not sure which order makes sense maybe to discuss, but you know, the one question is what helped you discover that dynamic or that, that opportunity and what was the effect of those relationships sort of only being surface level? Are you not putting in that, that, that is, I think you, as fair to say that that effort needed to grow and learn about their perspectives. So I guess what helped you discover that? What was the effect?

Kristie Tobias (10m 16s):
So the, I laugh because I can now look back and laugh at it. I didn't understand at the time that there were crumbling relationships around me and with that, I was starting to lose the trust of the executives that Pat entrusted us with the ability to do work for them and help them succeed. And so the effect was the loss of trust with the executives led to a loss of credibility and my effectiveness as a coach. And ultimately, and I actually share this in the book.

Kristie Tobias (10m 56s):
This is in one of the chapters of the book. I talk about something, this exact moment I lost my position. And so I was asked to step down from coaching and I was told coaching was no longer a fit for me and the way that it happened. And I talk about this in the book was, I mean, there's always better ways to do things. Let's be very honest, but as I reflect back to and thinking about the person that I am, I'm sure it shocked everyone when it came down to it, because there's a way that you present yourself and there's a way that people see you. And then there's that internal piece. It's kind of like when you think about a glacier or an iceberg on the surface, you think that you see the whole thing, but when you get down below the water, it could be, you know, several hundreds of feet deep.

Kristie Tobias (11m 41s):
And so it's understanding that that depth wasn't there that needed to be developed. And so I did lose my position and was asked to transition to another part of our company gratefully. We had been acquired by Huron Consulting Group at that time. And so now Studer Group you've heard me mentioned Studer Group is now Huron Consulting Group. And Huron has multiple different organizations that they have acquired. One of them is a performance improvement organization, very specifically focused on health care, performance improvement. And so I transitioned and truthfully was demoted to a position I lost like $30,000 in that transition as you get I, and I'm single, purposefully single, I should always say that I have a dog, but at that time I was dating someone who was living with me, who, you know, another mistake, not a favorite mistake, but different conversation for a different day,

Mark Graban (12m 38s):
Different podcast I say, but,

Kristie Tobias (12m 41s):
But he was not making money to sustain us. And so that $30,000 loss was a huge hit and it was a huge hit for me and my pride. It was a huge hit for us. But in that moment, in my transition, I was not excited about the transition. I was grateful to have a job. And so I took that and still within the same company. And I took that moment. And I have, and again, as you read my book, you'll see, my mother is my greatest mentor. She is not my cheerleader. She will never be my cheerleader. And she will always tell you that she is my coach. She's my mentor. And she's my check yourself crew. So those are those people who tell it like it is for value for you not to be mean, not to be disrespectful, but to bring value into your life.

Kristie Tobias (13m 25s):
And in the conversations with her, she said, careful what you wish for. And I remember I was kind of like, what do you mean? She's like, you told me, you were exhausted. You told me that you weren't really sure why you were doing what you were doing anymore. And as you were saying, that that's reflected in the work that you were doing. So you weren't putting forth the effort and you weren't putting forth the work. And it took me years to really understand that that is what was happening, but I didn't realize how much I had verbalize that. And she said, you're telling me, you've probably told other people too. And so it was that understanding of yes, for me. I didn't see it at first, but I did. And I knew that. But again, it was my favorite mistake because it was a reminder to myself of you have to put in the work you can't expect to just be great because you look great.

Kristie Tobias (14m 12s):
You sound great. People like you, that's not going to cut it. You have to really understand where people are coming from. Especially in this industry, you have to be able to connect and engage with people at a deeper level than just who are you as a person. It's but who is your, what is your organization? What is trying to drive your organization? What are the things that you're doing and how can I help support you first, before I ever think about what you're thinking about me and my perspective, that that was kind of bad effect that did happen. And then you'd asked me a second question as well.

Mark Graban (14m 44s):
Yeah. How'd you discover it? What was the effect? I think you, I think you covered, you know, the effect, but what, well, what else would you add? I think he, it was sort of, kind of intertwined a little.

Kristie Tobias (14m 57s):
Yeah. I started answering both and I was like, I feel like that works, but I think what I also just number two though, was as I transitioned to a new role, I was the opposite happened. So as a coach, I was the youngest coach in my role by 2010 to 20 years easily, when I transitioned into a role in, it was performance improvement as revenue cycle was the oldest person by like 10 years. And I was like barely in my thirties. And so it was a moment of like, Oh my goodness. And I have people who are leading me that are younger than I am. This has never happened in my career. At this point, I was always used to being the youngest person, always the trailblazer.

Kristie Tobias (15m 37s):
But as I also reflected back, I also was used to building new positions or being the first one in a position. And now I'm realizing there is an entire company that literally bases its bread and butter on helping organizations be better versions of themselves. And they've been doing this for longer than I've been alive. So how are you going to then help support the work that needs to be done now that you are being told you are no longer good enough for the role you had because you didn't put in the work. So now shifted. And so I did have to shift it and I had to humble myself a lot because the side of the company I went into, I went from being a people leader to being an analyst, a financial analyst, and I'd done financial analysts analyzing before.

Kristie Tobias (16m 21s):
When I first came over to what was then Studer Group that was for like six months. And then I was transitioned and promoted. This was requiring me to really dig deep into, you know, Excel spreadsheets and all of these things that, you know, people that were younger than me had been learning for years. And I was like, I'll get this, I have to go back here. But it was a humbling experience. Absolutely humbling experience for me.

Mark Graban (16m 45s):
Well, well, yeah. So thank you for telling the story. Like, you know, a lot of most guests stories are vulnerable stories and you know, like you said, usually there's a enough distance in the stories to look back and laugh, you know? So I appreciate you, you know, reflecting on some of that. So one other question, and then, you know, I do really, I want to talk about the book again. I we're joined by Krisite Tobias. Her book is Fearlessly Made You, if I, you know, listening to your story, did you w in terms of timeline, not really kind of fully understand what had transpired until after you were moved down to the role, is that

Kristie Tobias (17m 26s):
Right? Absolutely. Yeah, it took, and truthfully, I, there are still questions about some of the things that happened, but the bottom line of it was, I didn't really come to terms with my, my part in it, even though I should have much sooner, but, you know, pride goes before a fall, but I didn't come to terms a bit, probably easily months after the transition. I knew that I knew immediately in the back of my head, in my gut, that I had been coasting for a minute. I knew that, but really understanding what I didn't know in the work I didn't put in that was a good six months of just frustration and anger.

Kristie Tobias (18m 10s):
And it was funny because I transitioned very quickly into a client project in the heart of New York. And not that I love New York now, but it was like October, I think, in New York. And if you've ever been in New York in October, when it's blazing hot and you're having to ride the subway, I was, I was not happy, not thrilled. And so there was about three months there where I hated everything, but that it was a needed transition to be like, get yourself together. Do not, you know, you can't lose the work that you've put in before you got complacent.

Kristie Tobias (18m 51s):
And before you stopped putting in the effort for yourself. Yeah. And it made a difference for sure, in that transition, but it did take about six months. I stayed within that role for a little under two years and really grew and thrived in that role because I was not going to make that same mistake of not putting in the effort and putting in the work, even if it was a different type of work being used to being at the executive level, I was no longer there. I was wasn't even necessarily at the leadership level. A lot of times, sometimes I was at that frontline supervisor, frontline employee level. And I think that was the best place for me to be because it was understanding, you know, there are people who have put in so much time and effort, and now we're trying to change everything that they're doing and you can't change what people don't want to change, but you also can't change what you're not willing to put in the effort to understand how to change yourself.

Kristie Tobias (19m 49s):
So it took, that was a humbling. And a lot of the things that I had already been naturally gifted at, which is building those relationships, having that conversation and in that communication, because I was going into a role that is much more analytical, I was able to provide some of that support and coaching to my own internal teams, but it was that adjustment of, but it's not my role anymore to be that people leader. And that, that was a very big shift for me, a needed shift, but a very big shift.

Mark Graban (20m 21s):
Well, I mean, it sounds like the lessons from all of that have stuck with you. So as you ended up now going forward into other opportunities, I mean, you know, cause you know, the, the, the, the podcast here is, you know, about learning from our mistakes. And I mean, it seems like that, that, you know, it, that has happened. So that's, that's the positive of all this. And, you know, you talk about being the best versions of, and things you do to be the best version of yourself. And we talked about the book Fearlessly Made You: Surviving and Thriving in a Perfectly Imperfect Life. Again, is that title and subtitle.

Mark Graban (21m 3s):
So, you know, they say don't judge a book by its cover, but I think we learn a lot about a book from its title. What, what does the phrase “fearlessly made you” mean? And then how does that connect to the book and, and, and putting this out

Kristie Tobias (21m 22s):
Great question. And I love that question because I grew up, my faith is very important to me, always has been. And so there's a Bible verse that says you are fearfully and wonderfully made. And my mom and I were talking about sharing my story, my stroke story, and struggled through post-traumatic stress disorder. And she had been encouraging me for years to share that story. And every time she did, she always brought it back to that Bible versa, sharing your story. Isn't a flaw it's reminding people that your imperfections help you be fearfully and wonderfully made. And so out of that came “Fearlessly Made You,”

Kristie Tobias (22m 2s):
and I use the phrase fearless, not because I am not afraid, but because I don't allow the fear to define me. And I think oftentimes, and I will say, especially for women, young women, minority women, old women, doesn't matter, I will say, especially for women, but I think this also happens with men. We just mentioned don't often share it. There is a lot of fears that we have about being vulnerable, being in situations that are uncertain, just about trying to live life and embracing the imperfections, or as I call them imperfections or gifts that life gives us. And so I think when we think about how we can own our journeys in life and be okay with the imperfections and be okay with the fact that life is not perfect and life is messy, but know that we don't have to always react to that messiness.

Kristie Tobias (22m 53s):
We can take the time to respond in a way that makes sense for us and only us, because we are the only people that are called to live that Fearlessly Made You existence. And that's really, and I hope that comes off. My goal was at that first, when you look at it, that's the, Oh, this is saying something more than what I am living. And so that's where that Fearlessly Made You title has come from.

Mark Graban (23m 16s):
Yeah. Yeah. And I mean, in a way we're all fearlessly still being made. I mean, we are made already, but that's where growth and progress builds on top of that, I guess.

Kristie Tobias (23m 33s):
Absolutely. And I that's, the thing is if you're not growing, if you're not open to the fact that it doesn't matter how old you get, there's something that's going on and there's always an opportunity for you to, to embrace your life path and journey is and whatever direction it's going to go, then I think you're missing something. It's just so important to remember that, that we, we live in this life. We have just this one life and it's ours to own. It's ours to be okay with the imperfections and it's ours to thrive in as well. You don't have to always be in that survival mode. You can thrive even a mix, you know, the traumas and struggles that 2020s, 20, 21 that are happening.

Kristie Tobias (24m 14s):
Right.

Mark Graban (24m 15s):
I mean, I think that phrase perfectly imperfect is really interesting and thought provoking. And, you know, it gets me thinking of, you know, where do you find the balance between accepting who you are and what you've done while also striving to become better realizing none of us are perfect. I demonstrate that all the time I embrace, you know, the fact that none of us are perfect and, you know, in a way that's one of the themes here, but on, in this, in this whole podcast series, but where, where do you find the balance Kristie between acceptance and striving in terms of improvements, self, betterment, whatever you might call it,

Kristie Tobias (24m 55s):
You know, I'll be really transparent. I feel like if I had consistently found that balance, I'd probably be a millionaire living in Fiji, in a boat. What I will tell you is in ringing in the new year, I realized more than ever that that balance was something that I still hadn't quite grasped. And a lot of that is when you have been pushing yourself to be a better version of you, when you guide organizations or you guide people to be better versions of themselves, you forget that the you, that you are still has those imperfections and they will not destroy you unless you pretend they don't exist.

Kristie Tobias (25m 38s):
And that is my that's my fatal flaw. I know that about myself. I am perfectionist. Isn't even the word. I'm very focused on controlling the outcomes and the environment around me, because I don't want to find myself hurt a lot of that stems from years of. And you'll read this in the book, abuse both sexually and physically from a relationship that I was in for six years. But I think that's the easy way out and saying, that's the reason it's some of the reason it's in there. A lot of the reason is me and how I'm built and who I am as a person. And so I have to be okay with diving into those difficulties, the things that my flaws make me, me and I am very comfortable saying that, but I can't just say it.

Kristie Tobias (26m 26s):
There are flaws that are dangerous for who I am as a person. They're dangerous for the people around me. And so I have to be okay with working on those as well. And if I don't work on those first, I will hide them and replace them with trying to be better. There are things that we know inherently that we have replaced with optimization or improvement, but they're still there. And they kind of sneak up on us when we least expect them. That happened to me at the beginning of the new year. I had some latent issues that I had never truly dealt with. I just use them as, Oh, they're just my imperfections. It's fine. But I wasn't paying attention to the way they were coming out.

Kristie Tobias (27m 6s):
I was so focused on making sure everyone else was okay, everything else is okay, I'll deal with this later. I didn't deal with it until it came out in a very dramatic way, never grades, but it's, it's that reminder that you are human and you have to deal with you first. You can't keep trying to improve and ignore that opportunities where you have our imperfections, that that could hurt us in others. Yeah.

Mark Graban (27m 31s):
One other question I wanted to ask before we wrap up on your website, there was a link to an article from about three years ago that talked about you kind of taking this new journey around strength, training and, and bodybuilding competition. Like, what did you learn from, from going through that and that those new experiences?

Kristie Tobias (27m 52s):
That's a great question. I learned, I do not like asparagus.

Mark Graban (27m 57s):
There's a lot of it on the diet?

Kristie Tobias (27m 59s):
There's a lot of it. No, it's funny because I grew up an athlete, my entire family, I'm the oldest of four, we're all athletes. And so growing up an athlete and then moving into a travel lifestyle, like a consultant to very counter-intuitive things, it seems like it would work because you're constantly moving, but you're constantly moving on the road where airport food and restaurants or fast food are at your disposal at all times, and you're not sleeping well, you're not really managing your stress. Well, so all of that leads to unhealthiness overall. Sure. And I will even say like, oftentimes people think about like weight gain and things like that. It's just unhealthiness period. It doesn't matter what you look like physically.

Kristie Tobias (28m 40s):
It's how you're feeling internally. And so bodybuilding for me, I had a friend who ran an outdoor fitness business and he recommended that I connect with, and she'll be more than happy for me to share her name's Nicole. She was my trainer. And she became a very, very close friend of mine because the first thing she told me before I ever decided to do body building was, there is no reason why we will do this for your body. This has to be for you, your spiritual, your mental health, because otherwise you will be destroyed. And she was absolutely right. And so it shifted a lot of my perspective. So I grew up competing in pageants. And so a lot of my focus when it came to shaping my body and things like that was very physical.

Kristie Tobias (29m 21s):
Wasn't mental, wasn't spiritual was very physical and I gave her that background. And so she shifted my perspective to think about what is it that spiritually and mentally you feel like you need to heal. It really shifted the way that I look at sports and working out and healthy eating and healthy lifestyle. And so for about a year I bought the building, it, I did compete. I won three medals, which was totally like, it was so funny because we even said, she was like, if you're not ready, we're not going to do this. So I approached it with, you know, the tenacity, the discipline, the determination, but it was also in the back of my head. If I'm not ready, I'm not ready. And I think that actually propelled me even further because I was no longer doing this for someone else or something else.

Kristie Tobias (30m 4s):
It was just for health and healing for me. And it was, it was wonderful. And I've since no longer been doing bodybuilding, I still weight lift. I actually do more cycling. But what I have done is every year I started infusing some other type for me working out as a release, it's my stress relief. So I infuse some other type of working out. So cycling has been for the past couple of years, one of my other types of working out in addition to, to weight lifting. But it's because it's about how am I ensuring that my mental and spiritual wellness is the focal point, not how I look, but what's my release, what that looks like with me growing and releasing the negativity, but building up that both under the mental and spiritual realm.

Kristie Tobias (30m 46s):
Yeah.

Mark Graban (30m 48s):
So thank you for sharing some of the learnings there. So not many of us get in the situation where we get to earn metals.

Kristie Tobias (30m 57s):
So that's, what's new as an adult, you can still earn a medal.

Mark Graban (31m 3s):
It wasn't a participation ribbon. It was a medal.

Kristie Tobias (31m 6s):
One of them was, but that's okay. I was the only one in the category for one of them, but that's okay. But thank you.

Mark Graban (31m 21s):
But anyway, that's still…Congratulations. And in that article, is there on the sidebar of Kristie's website, which is www.fearlesslymadeyou.com. that's the title of the book. Again, our guest has been Kristie Tobias. The book is titled Fearlessly Made You: Surviving and Thriving in a Perfectly Imperfect World. So again, congratulations on, on the book as an author, I know, you know, Oh, it's a big endeavor. So I always applaud anyone who gets that book to the finish line. It says on your website, you've got a podcast coming soon.

Kristie Tobias (31m 54s):
All right. So one of the things I'm sure anyone listening and you've picked up on is I love to talk. I love to learn about people as well. And so one of the great things was when the book each was finalized the marketing team for the publishing company. And I had this conversation, I had planned on starting a podcast prior to even writing the book. And so we decided to hold and do just kind of one big launch of what is Fearlessly Made You. And so, yes, there's a book, but yes, there's also me connecting with people and it doesn't have to be celebrities. It's just people kind of like what you're doing here is people that inspire me, people that motivate me, but then also people who have true stories to talk about that aren't being talked about.

Kristie Tobias (32m 36s):
And so that podcast is coming soon. Very soon after the book is launched. And so I would just recommend everyone stay tuned to my website. You'll get all the details, but that is coming very quickly after we launched the book on February in February 16th.

Mark Graban (32m 51s):
And I, and it sounds like then the same title Fearlessly Made You. If people then go search in their podcast app or whatever, they okay.

Kristie Tobias (32m 59s):
Absolutely. Yet we're keeping it all made you look good.

Mark Graban (33m 4s):
So Kristie Tobias has been our guests. Thank you. It's good to reconnect with you and to see you and to talk to you. And again, congratulations on the book. I hope people will check it out and thank you for sharing here on the podcast. Thanks for listening. I hope this podcast inspires you to pause and think about your own favorite mistake and how learning from mistakes shapes you personally and professionally. If you're a leader, what can you do to create a culture where it's safe for colleagues to talk openly about mistakes in the spirit of learning, please subscribe, rate, and review the podcast. Our website is myfavoritemistakepodcast.com.

Mark Graban (33m 45s):
See you next time.


Mark Graban is an internationally-recognized consultant, author, and professional speaker who has worked in healthcare, manufacturing, and startups. His latest book is Measures of Success: React Less, Lead Better, Improve More. He is author of the Shingo Award-winning books Lean Hospitals and Healthcare Kaizen, as well as The Executive Guide to Healthcare Kaizen. He also published the anthology Practicing Lean that benefits the Louise H. Batz Patient Safety Foundation, where Mark is a board member. Mark is also a Senior Advisor to the technology company KaiNexus. He is also a Senior Advisor and Director of Strategic Marketing with the healthcare advisory firm, Value Capture.